2 Sprite Lemon-Lime Sodas (24 oz. plastic bottle)
Item Purchased: 2 Sprite Lemon-Lime Sodas (24 oz. plastic bottle)
Location Purchased: Jim’s Original / 1250 S. Union St. / Chicago, IL
Price: $2.50 w/tax ($1.25 ea.)
Review: I don’t partake in carbonated drinks too often. I didn’t even want to partake in this Coca-Cola product today, but after buying an old manager of mine a gourmet lunch at Jim’s Original and watching him suck down the tasty sparkling beverage from the neon green bottle in his hands, I had a hankering for one myself. I may be easily swayed or it may have been all of the moisture-eating salt floating around in my body after eating a Polish sausage and French Fries that muddled my brain with a desperation for moisture.
I tend to shy away from Sprite in particular because of that ridiculous ad campaign they had in the late 1990s with the slogan, “Obey Your Thirst,” where Coca-Cola used flashy imagery to prove that they didn’t have an image and urge you to simply drink whatever you want when you are thristy. Of course, the rub of the commercials was to subliminally convince you that you always wanted Sprite when you were thirsty because of their memorable anti-image. Coke was in on the nihilism of the time man! They were hip! Sweet! I’ll drink this nihilhipster drink from now on! I’m devoting my thirst to a brand because I’m thirsty, not because I’m easily swayed by advertising.
Yeah right.
Let’s be honest, Sprite starts off tasting pretty damn refreshing when it is ice cold and freshly cracked open. Shortly after, however, the fizz takes flight and all you are left with is a sweet and bitter syrupy aftertaste in your mouth. Millions of bottles of this stuff sell across the world every day proving one thing… We are all fucking morons. Squeeze some lemons and limes into a glass of seltzer water. That’s what lemon-lime soda is supposed to taste like. Not this sticky gutrot.
But, don’t listen to me. I like 7-Up.
I guess what I am trying to say is, “Obey your thirst.”
Rating: 1 / 5
Gum up your digestive system by buying some of this crap at Amazon.com: .
Image from Amazon.com
Leave a Comment