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Quick Release from Rapid Transit Cycle Shop

Item Purchased: Quick Release from Rapid Transit Cycle Shop
Location Purchased: Rapid Transit Cycle Shop / 1900 W. North Ave. / Chicago, IL
Price: $5.00 w/tax

Review: Dear Chicago Association of Bicycle Thieves,

This letter is a simple missive to ask why. Why would you simply take a quick release from my bicycle’s back wheel? I can understand the value of the entire wheel, gears and all, but quick releases are a dime a dozen (okay, actually $60, but that is retail price… you could net $10 at most for a dozen used quick releases). So, once again, why? Is it simply that your bike-stealing black market careers have conditioned you into roving kleptomaniacs, grabbing hold of any spare bike parts you come upon? Or was the individual you sent out to raze my bicycle last night a new recruit? Did he have so much trouble simply lifting the rear end of my bike and sliding the back wheel off that he had to resort to pointless component thievery? Maybe he only had one arm? Regardless, I can’t imagine this individual climbing the ranks of your organization too swiftly by simply coming back with handlebar tassels and quick releases. What, exactly, is the logic behind your burglary? Is it to rob from the haves and give to the have nots? I can respect that on a fundamental level. If not, though, then what? Personal gain? Again, this makes no sense. Did you, perhaps intend to unleash chaos on the unsuspecting biking public in Chicago? If so, I am sorry to admit that you came close but failed miserably. In the 5+ miles I biked without a quick release on my rear wheel, it would have been so easy for the frame to come loose from the wheel, catapulting me over my handlebars and into morning traffic on Western Ave. Fortunately for me, this didn’t happen. You lose. Fuck you.

Perhaps I should have more thoroughly examined my bicycle in the morning before riding it. Perhaps I shouldn’ t have so much faith in the general public (even petty thieves like you) to be at least mildly intelligent. Perhaps. Thank you for making me realize the error in my ways. I am just thankful that it didn’t take a trip to the hospital to do so.

Once again, with fondest regards… Fuck You.


Dear Employees of Rapid Transit Cycle Shop,

Thank you.

Thank you for not laughing in my face when I asked you if the replacement of a quick release required some sort of alignment. . Thank you for quickly fixing my bike and sending me on my way. Thank you for your affordable prices. Finally, thank you for being one of the best no-nonsense bicycle shops in the city of Chicago. You are truly a staff that believes in biking as a way of life and not a supplier of car roof ornaments. I am forever a fan.


Rating: 4.75 / 5

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